It will be a new day again :)
January 06, 2018
Yesterday it was sun outside. The sky was blue and people were lying under the bus stop in the park and wait for the bus. It was Friday, so its was a good day to make a stories. I always end up being alone unlike all my friend they were going to parties, going to the movies with lovers, going to vacation with families and can laugh perfect and loudly. my friend find their own success and level up but me i just wanting to make through the day...
There's a doubts inhabits my brain sometimes... like a lock in the brain, making me hard to think. A little memories got through and the sky turn so grey and i couldn't look at it because its made me sad. tears in my eyes and they quietly drop in the floor that's what i got on my day. Tried to keep focus on what important then sitting blaming myself and rewrote trash stories but the sadness kept growing , exploding to the chest. take puff of cigarette and i just want to be fine...
This thing is not beautiful, this thing is not useful and you can't do anything with it and it tries to control you...
So i try to stay away from destructive tools i used to learn, the smoking, the starving, the running and the madness. thinking it will help but it only feeds fire and i don't want to hurt myself anymore....
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